Winter

The allure of mystery… excitement of a new place to call home. These bricks housed so much that it feels like a lifetime’s worth of memories condensed down into something that now seems so brief and fleeting. Noisy during the day but eerily silent in the dead of night, it was a hub of energy and optimism and empowerment… as well as strange happenings with nearby residents. It was the best. Beside the draughty window, looking out across tracks and over the bridge into the town, all whilst cosied up watching the TV, was my favourite perching spot. It was just… right. This abode was the perfect size too… I think there’s a lot to be said for knowing something inside-and-out; it feels inherently familiar on an instinctual level before long. That familiarity allowed us to come up with some out-of-left-field solutions to problems that totally worked, and I love that. I’m so proud of what we achieved by just looking at things and problem-solving it. I will forever savour that sense of responsibility and discovery I experienced there. The first winter was the toughest. It was so cold. The fan heater and radiators were my best friends. Before we got those, it was rough.

Looking back on it now, I don’t know why we allowed ourselves to struggle so much. I think it was perhaps we wanted to stand on our own four feet, collectively, and show the world that we could do it? I guess that’s the benefit of hindsight, right? It’s ten times easier to see where what could’ve been done better, or in certain circumstances where the wheels came off entirely — and that’s okay. That’s life. Sometimes I can’t help but look back a lot and return to the well for another taste of sweet nostalgia. But… those days are fleeting now and I think that’s a natural conclusion for the whole saga. That residence was my first real true taste of independence and I will always carry that era fondly in my heart. Mistakes were made and much was learned and that feeling is so empowering. Round the brick-paved corner, over the step and up those faded turquoise lay the memories of what was. Onward, brave soldier; there will be better times ahead - and more plentiful ones too. Keep the faith that this will reveal itself in time.